My Future Life.

The things I would do if  WILL do when I..
1) No longer live with my parents
2) Own Rent my own place
3) Have an income
4) Have children
5) Graduate from grad school.

I will dress my kid up in hilarious Halloween costumes!

When my kid can't walk yet...

Source: google.com via Taryn on Pinterest

When my kid is still too young to know I'm dressing *it* for my own entertainment...


I will live here:
Large porch + lots of windows

Source: dongardner.com via Mallory on Pinterest

Put this stuff inside it...
Walk up/slide down

Source: daddytypes.com via Mallory on Pinterest

H U G E  sofa

Source: charxandercandor.tumblr.com via Mallory on Pinterest

Sticks + Frame

Source: cleverlyinspired.blogspot.com via Mallory on Pinterest

Chair:

Source: designsponge.com via Mallory on Pinterest

Wall Decor

Source: ohdeedoh.com via Pinterest on Pinterest

Elmer glue + canvas (I'd probably add a pinch of sparkle to it!)

Source: virginiaandcharlie.blogspot.com via Mallory on Pinterest

Source: tarasloggett.com via Mallory on Pinterest

Book Shelf

Source: google.com via Mallory on Pinterest

Cant forget to have a f a t cat "running" around!

Source: flickr.com via Pinterest on Pinterest

You can view all of my someone else's super creative ideas that I stole on my pinterest page here: http://pinterest.com/malkent/

Ahhh someday... but for now, I've got 2 tests and a project due today. I better quit daydreaming! xoxo

September 11th, 2001

I was a sophomore in high school. 2nd hour. I was sitting in the front row of my biology class (assigned seating... obviously. Why teachers place the talkative, attention-seeking, know-it-alls in the front of the classroom is beyond me... but that discussion is for a different day...) praying for an escape from the interminable monotonous lecture.

What I would've given for a cell phone during that class. However, one student did and all of a sudden this quiet, smart kid in the back raised his hand. "Umm I just got a text from my friend in Mrs. Kinely's room that said a plane hit a building in New York and it's on fire so they're watching the news down there... can we watch the news?" The teacher kindly responded, "Absolutely not. If we have time at the end of class I'll turn it on but we've got a lot of stuff to cover."

Shortly after, a loud-mouth (also in the front row) interrupted the teacher to tell her that all the other teachers turned on the news, too. With a little more convincing, our teacher to turn on the news.

I vividly remember the words "Terrorist" and "Twin Towers" highlighted at the bottom of the screen. Me being the super-genius kid that I was, had no idea what either of those words meant. Apparently neither did my teacher because she said "oh gosh, it's nothing. You guys can watch it in your next class if your teacher allows it but I'm going to continue on with my lecture." She turned the TV off.

Although I had no idea what was going on the high-level of drama, gossip, and distraction from classroom activities was right down my ally. As passing period arrived, I remember a friend trying to explain to me what a terrorist is--I didn't get it.

3rd hour. World Cultures. News on. Glued to the news as we watched and re-watched the plane, and the second plane, purposely, viciously, and maliciously hit the twin towers. The tower fell. You could see people jumping out of windows. Chaos.

September 11th, 2001 

10 years ago

You can watch this video on youtube at 9-11-01

Here's to all the men and women that lost their lives. And to the men, women, and children that are still recovering from the trauma they suffered that day, and many years following. My deepest empathy. My most sincere prayers.

frumforum.com

911review.com

eworldpost.com

Stupid. Stupider.

The other day I saw the back of a company shirt that read:

Providing quality service since 10 years.

A company shirt. How embarrassing! Thanks to someone in an upper-level management position who didn't catch the error or didn't know the difference... oops???

After witnessing that poorly advertised company shirt I was motivated to dedicate an entire blog post to businesses that use poor grammar. And I will forever judge them.

"If YOUR single so am I" 

WetSeal

If you don't know what's wrong with this shirt... look it up. And feel embarrassed...

"Lets Go!"

Old Navy

Note: These t-shirts were designed for college teams. BAH! Kind of ironic.

"YOURSOCUTE" boots

Nine West

"Have your girlfriends tell you 'Yoursocute' when you show up to your lunch date in these remarkable suede wedge heel boots." 

This is annoying for so many reasons. 

I hate that they forced 3 words together.

I hate how they advertise for them.

I hate that they put YOUR instead of YOU'RE

Even if it was You're so cute... it's still stupid.

"WELCOME FREE WIFE CONTIL BREAKFAST INDOOR POOL & HOT TUB..."

No... it's not the lack of commas that is noteworthy here. Free WIFE! HAHAHA!

Now seriously... this is so sad. It should be sent to Jay Leno... 

Although this last example doesn't have a grammatical error... it's still disappointing... just in general

"I'm too pretty to do homework so my brother has to do it for me." 

JC Penny

Yeah... because girls are there to look pretty and boys are there to be smart. This shirt makes me sick. 

This shirt clearly was designed to make it to the JC Penny floor in the early 80's but somehow got placed  in 2011... sick. Just blah.  

Here's why grammar matters:

Please note: although I find poor grammar amusing, please don't judge my poor grammar. We can judge:

Old Navy

WetSeal

Nine West

Days Inn

JC Penny

But don't judge me! That's fair! Thanks!

*Some examples found on http://thegrammarvandal.wordpress.com

The First World Problems Rap

Which I prefer to title the "lazy generation." This 17-year old kid captures exactly what I mean...

"The First World Problems" By Zach Katz

I hate to sound like a cranky old woman but I believe this teenage generation has been blessed with technology... Internet... lightening speed solutions to homework questions... zero tolerance for waiting on answers... I could go on and on.

Does this techno-generation have an unconscious... or conscious... entitlement to things previous generations had to work undoubtedly hard for? Prosperous jobs? Money? Success? I'm starting to think so. This nature of entitlement could have serious consequences in the future for both the generation as well as our society as a whole.

Will college enrollment rates decrease because kids think someone will soon discover the YouTube video's they have been creating for the last 4 years instead of studying for tests at school. Do they yearn to become instantly rich and famous with as little effort as possible? Will the rate of kids living with their parents after age 21 skyrocket because they can't tear themselves away from a video game? Will they give up on learning new things if they don't get a lightening speed solution or response?


Maybe I am a cranky old woman... but I think I have a point!

Rhyme for the Time.

I've neglected my blog... but for good reason.

I have been...

Boating in the Ozarks,

A bachelorette party in Minneapolis,

Watched fireworks in Kansas City,

Drove to Chicago to see my sissy!

I have been mountain biking,

I have been mountain climbing,

I have seen a male stripper... 

Oh how I wish I was lying...

I have played a lot of sports,
Like kickball in Chicago,

Beer pong in Kansas City,

... Des Moines and Colorado

I have canoed on a river,

Layed out by the pool,

Became tearful at weddings,

And danced like a fool.

This summer has been an adventure,

For that I am sure,

I even got a black eye,

From a really tall guy.

It's only a matter of time,

Until my fun will end,

School is on it's way here,

This fill me with great fear. 

But summer is not over yet,

There is more fun to be had,

I'm getting on a plane tomorrow,

And headed for ORLANDO!!!!

Bachelorette Parties

Kiley

Angela

Anne

Boating in the Ozarks...

Chicago, Ill.

Crested Butte, Colorado

On our way up the mountain... snow... in July!

We were so high up (given the elevation at ground level was 19,000+) 

I actually became strangely affected by the altitude. 

I thought I was going to throw up over the side of the mountain, I was shaking, and became weirdly emotional... I can't explain it. It was weird.

Brad: "Why are you crying?"

Me: "I don't know... I can't stop"

Brad: "oh geez... again?"  Roles eyes.

The Black Eye

I'm sure you are all wondering how a grown adult gets a black eye? Or you're thinking my BF did it. But it was a frying pan. That's right. A frying pan hit me in the face. A HUGE frying pan fell from the ceiling of stephanie's apartment and hit me straight in the face.

I totally pulled it off though... don't worry.

However, Brad sure did get some dirty looks over the past 2 weeks. Yes, I still have a black eye... two weeks later. But I've learned to work what the pan gave me!!!

I will leave you with a candid Stephanie captured. It appears as though I'm meditating and the Lord is beaming down on me. Although the Lord may be beaming down on me, I actually just got done with a steep hike and was enjoying an ice cold Budwiser.

Hard. Ass.

Rapture or Not: Let's Analyze.

Shut up... it could happen! Let me explain...

Monday morning my sister, Morgan, sent me this link to an article/broadcast on NPR, titled "The End is Near." Apparently, Harold Camping, an 86-year-old has predicted that Judgement Day will occur...

TOMORROW...?

Crap. 

Over the past 5 days I have done some serious thinking. What if it happens... am I ready? Besides, it's gotta happen sometime, right? Why not tomorrow? 

Now, my issue isn't with dying or the world ending per-say. It's with how the world will end. According to the bible, it is a very scary event. One that I wish to not witness. Surely the God I know wouldn't allow me, a sweet, innocent little girl witness this event...

I couldn't stop thinking about death, dying, heaven, hell, the end of the world, the whole sha-bang. I know... you're probably thinking: dramatic much, Mallory? But when was the last time you seriously thought about it? If ever? Everything sounds far too dramatic. Far too extreme. And to be honest, far too scary... for such a loving, peaceful, forgivable God that we all know and love. I mean... think about it: What if the words in the bible are literal and true? 

What if when the world ends it will be horror above all horror? 

Do those who don't believe really go to hell? 

What about teenagers who are simply in a rebellious phase? 

What about the mean people in the world that do terribly mean thing who simply weren't given enough love from their parents? 

It really doesn't seem fair to leave anyone behind. I feel like the God I love would allow everyone into Heaven. Some people weren't given the same opportunities like... wonderful parents, sufficient resources, support system... etc.

God must take all of this into account, right?

 I really hope.

I concluded these thoughts are occurring because of two reasons:

 1) I have far too much time on my hands right now (no job... no school... no kids...) 

 2) My relationship with God has drifted since the last time I thought about a rapture. 

Which I must say would probably be around the age of ummmm... 5!

For this reason, I met with my friend, mentor, and youth leader, Brenda Applegate, who is laid-back enough to understand where I'm coming from and competent enough to help me work through these uncertainties.

 So... what I know... now:

1) God is Just

He knows all hearts, all things. He has the ability to measure someones heart in a way we cannot conceptualize. Everything will be justified. It will be fair. It will be very fair. No need to worry about that.

2) God is in the world... right now. 

He witnesses and feels the temptations, pressures, choices, and decisions you make. Every day. He's there. He's a current, present God. Not just a God from ancient, unthinkable, olden-times. 

I learned a lot more than that in the past few days but those are the main things. I am not scared or worried anymore that I will witness the rapture. I have faith that God will not make me witness it. I hope. Most importantly, I learned I've got a relationship to work on. But, that's fine. I've got nothing but time... I guess I might as well invest some time into my eternity. 

I know this blog post was a bit heavy but you know what, sometimes we need to do some deep thinking... organize our thoughts and re-prioritize. 

Thanks everyone for reading.

Thoughts & Predictions

First off, I want to thank those of you who read my blog this week regarding Planned Parenthood and the government shut down. A special thanks to those who commented, e-mailed, or messaged me about your feelings and opinions. It's so important that we all work to be informed as possible.

On a lighter note, PIA went home. We all know she wasn't my first pick but it had nothing to do with her talent-she was more than qualified to remain in at least the top 3. My guess is voters assumed Pia would not have a problem with votes so they spent their time voting for the contestants that were more on the fence.

A similar thing happened in 2006 with Chris Daughtry. This was the worst year of American Idol history when the grey-haired, not that talented, Tayler Hicks won. What a joke. Chris Daughtry was hands-down the most talented and well-liked contestant but only made it to the top 4 due to votes.

The 2006 American Idol shocker:

Now, dry your eyes, there are plenty of super talented contestants left.

Thoughts: Who did I vote for?

LAUREN ALAINA!

I want her to win. Natural, effortless talent. 

The only thing holding her back is her confidence appears to be lacking... but with a voice like that she has the world in the palm of her hand. Besides, the past 2 weeks have been fantastic!!!

My advice for her would be to watch Stefano perform because she should be doing riffs just like the way he does them!

Speaking of Stefano...

Yes, I voted for him. His performance deserved it.

 I was in awe last night. He's in it to win it! 

I would be really disappointed if he goes home tonight. REALLY disappointed.

Jacob 

Still my favorite male. The past 2 weeks haven't been as impressive compared to his previous performances. I'm worried he took the judges a little too seriously when they told him he needs to be more controlled and less dramatic. Now he's a little too stationary. I want my dramatic man back!! I bet he'll bring it next week!

James Durbin

I hate the music and to be honest I don't know anyone who likes it. But then again, I'm a bit of a teeny-bopper. The only thing I can note on is that he is an entertaining performer and I like the fact that he positively represents Turrets Syndrome.  I don't mind him sticking around, even though I admittedly find his music a little ridiculous.

Scotty McCreepy

Similarly, I don't like Scotty's country twang but I realize there are plenty of people who do, and he is quite talented in that aspect. I still find him McCreepy. 

I anticipate trouble for the following 3...

Paul McDonald

I do like this guy but I haven't liked his performances or song choices lately. He needs like a John Mayer song or something. He's got a really unique voice which has a ton of potential. But lets be honest... 

if his outfit choices aren't distracting enough, his annoying dancing/tweeking/jittering around the stage like he's hyped on something will definitely do it. 

Haley Reinhart

I didn't love this performance. We all know I love this girl because I'm jealous of her hippie-chic style and her raspy voice. The last 2 weeks were fantastic but this week she fell short of impressive. 

Casey Abrams

Blah. I didn't like it. I think it's his time to go. I found it absolutely absurd he got a standing ovation for his lame-ass performance. If he makes it through, it's not because of his performance, it will be because of the judges promotion to vote for him. Even I was somewhat convinced he should make it through after the feedback from the judges. What crap!

Let's be real, all of these contestants are super talented. But there are still some contestants that if they won... I would be disappointed.

(cough, cough: Casey, James, Paul, McCreepy). 

Prediction:

I obviously have not had the best luck predicting but here goes nothing:

Between Paul, Haley, and Casey...

 PAUL will go home. 

Boom.